A lot of things have come at me recently which have deflated my will to accomplish anything. In other words, I am in a blue funk. This time of year is bad for me anyways, and I tend to get very melancholy, but now there is a new enemy that I must pray and ask God to make go away.
It's a hard lesson to accept, when you learn that you are not in control. Everyday we make decisions, deluding ourselves into thinking that we are in control of our lives. Maybe that's my mistake, I shouldn't begin to imagine that I have any authority over my life. Even though I know in my heart that God is in control; in my mind, I still have thoughts that I have some inkling of power over what happens in my life. However, recently, I have come to the realization that this is not the case and that I am going to have to let go of everything. I have yet to do that, even after everything that happened almost four years ago, I have yet to do that.
Right here and now, I am going to let myself go and float on the river of Peace that God will send me and quit worrying about the details. God knows I love Him and He will ease all my burdens, if I will just let Him. The problem is, I don't think I have ever really let Him before now. May be that is the lesson He has been trying to teach me and I haven't been listening.
God, please let me rest in Your arms and lay all my worries and burdens at Your feet. I pray that You will give me peace and comfort from all that I foresee as my enemy. I ask for Your protection, both physically and mentally, to strengthen my resolve; behind Your shield and armor, from all earthly pestilences, sin and despair. I pray that You would ease my heart from imagined hurts and busy my mind from all ill-conceived possibilities. I pray that You will give me the reasoning and wisdom to open my heart so that I am able to place all my trust in You, and lean on You. I pray that You show me how to live my life and allow me to live it, so that others may see You in me.
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